Saturday, 8 February 2014

The Mystery Cookie

‘Time you learnt your lesson you greedy bastard,’ the note said. It was celotaped to a little toy coffin and placed in the middle of Jimmy’s desk exactly where for the last four weeks a cookie had been placed. Jimmy had never known who the cookie was from but each morning he had eaten the cookie with his morning cup of tea. The first morning he had been a little nervous that it had been left by mistake but when no one had claimed it by morning break Jimmy couldn’t resist and he had quickly demolished the cookie. Each day since he had received a different cookie and by the start of week two he was struggling to wait until morning break to devour his treat.

He had started smiling at all the girls in the office and none of them seemed to be paying him any more attention than usual. He hoped Michelle, the office PA, had left it. She was beautiful and always talked to him. The only thing was she was a fitness nut and often complained of the calorific lunches he ate. But there was no clue as to who had left the cookies or where the coffin had appeared from.

Jimmy sat down with a thump onto his office chair and started to take deep breaths.

‘You okay there Jimmy?’ called Pete from the opposite desk.

‘Yes fine thanks mate.’ Jimmy lifted his hand in thanks and slid the toy coffin into his top draw.

Once Jimmy had managed to get his breath he took the coffin out of his draw and popped it into his pocket. He walked towards the toilets and looked around him as he went. Everyone seemed to be focused on their work. No one was looking at him. No one cared his life had been threatened.

He walked into the bathroom and after checking all the cubicles were empty he locked himself into the last one, lowered the toilet lid and sat down. Jimmy slowly slid the coffin out of his pocket and looked at the note attached to it.

The note was printed in capitals and there was no clue as to who had written it. He turned the coffin over in his hand and as he did it fell open. A small folded piece of paper flittered to the floor. Jimmy bent down and felt a twinge as his chest tightened. He stretched his arm and managed to tweezer the folded paper between the second and third fingers of his right hand. He carefully lifted the paper and unfolded it.

The cookies you have been eating are slowly eking a deadly poison into your system. The next one could be the killer cookie. Act now!!!!

Jimmy sat starting at the note and would have stayed like that all day if someone hadn’t entered the toilet and started banging about. Jimmy flushed the toilet and headed back to his desk. There in the middle of his desk was a brochure for the local gym and a weight watchers booklet. Jimmy grabbed them both and pushed them into his bag under the desk.


Six months later Jimmy walked into the office and threw his gym bag under his desk. He couldn’t believe how easy it had been. Six months before he would have been out of breathe just climbing the two flights of stairs and now he could easily manage the three mile run to work.

Wait, what the? Jimmy thought.

There in the middle of Jimmy’s Desk was an extra large double chocolate chip cookie. Jimmy looked at it and licked his lips. He lifted the cookie and inhaled its smooth chocolaty smell. He looked at it and turned, taking in the office and all his colleagues as he did. No one was looking at him. He hadn’t had a cookie for six months and this one was his all time favourite. Jimmy closed his eyes and opened his hand. The cookie fell straight down into the bin. Before Jimmy opened his eyes he felt a slap on his back and then another and another. As he opened his eyes everyone in the office was crowded round him.

‘Jimmy, I’m so proud of you.’ Michelle walked through the crowd. She was almost a foot smaller than Jimmy. She looked up and smiled. Her green eyes sparkled and she needed to stand on tiptoes, even in her five inch heels, to put her arms around his neck. ‘I was so worried about your health. I didn’t know what to do.’

‘It was you. The cookies and the coffin?’

‘Yes, are you very angry?’

‘No. I want to thank you. You gave me the push I needed. I still have a way to go but the weight I’ve lost is all thanks to you.’

‘No, it’s all your hard work.’ Michelle said

‘Well maybe we can discuss this over dinner tonight?’

‘Yes please.’ Michelle pulled Jimmy down to a more comfortable height and kissed him.

The rest of the office cheered and enveloped them both in a group hug.


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