My name is Paris and I am a beautiful man. When your mother names you after a character from a Jilly Cooper novel you need to grow up beautiful or life can be tough. Last check in the mirror and I am ready for Friday night. I like what I see. Tall, slender, hair black as a starless night and cornflower blue eyes. When I turn on the charm they twinkle and I have yet to find a girl that can resist that. Right off we go women of Nottingham beware.
I don't know where all the babes are tonight. It is very rare I get as far as the club without pulling. I may have to lower my standards if I'm to get a shag tonight. Ah there's one. Plain but not ugly. She'll do.
'Hi there. I'm Paris.' I give her the eye twinkle and straight away I can tell she has forgotten her mates and will be mine tonight.
'Wow,' she actually said wow. This is going to be too easy.
My name is Paris and I am a beautiful man. Last check of the mirror and I am ready for Friday night. I like what I see suddenly the door bell rings. As I go down the stairs I can see what looks like two coppers through the frosted glass door.
I slowly open the door.
'Good evening officers how may I help you?'
'Are you Paris Jones?'
'Yes I am'
'Did you spend last Friday night with Suzy Sutcliffe?'
'I don't think so. Oh wait there was that girl from the nightclub. I think her name was Suzy.'
'Please accompany us to the police station.'
'I am sorry but I am meeting some people in an hour. Can I not come tomorrow? What is this all about anyway.'
'We need you to come with us now.'
'Well I can't. I am busy.' I was starting to lose my temper.
'In that case we are arresting you for the rape of Suzy Sutcliffe.'
They grabbed me, handcuffed me and manhandled me into the back of the police car.
The next few months passed in a blur. I was formally arrested and charged and somehow the whole thing went to court. I explained to the jury how Suzy had said it was okay to go back to her place and she was up for it. consensual is the term they used. Once her barrister started questioning me I did have to admit she had tried to change her mind once we got back to her place. But I knew she was just nervous. I mean look and her and look at me who wouldn't want me? I had stayed the night. Rapists don't stay the night, they attack women in alleyways and are ugly and wear anoraks.
The jury were back within the hour. I was in the clear. What did they mean guilty? How could they think I was guilty. She wanted me, I know she did.
I don't recall the sentencing it was all a blur. Apparently as I showed no remorse that made it worse for me. Five years they said with no chance of parole for at least three. One of those grim looking guards pushed me into the van to be transported to prison. Just as he turned to close the door he smiled at me
' There will be lots of people who want you now. Enjoy.' The door slammed and the real nightmare began.